Porcelain Smile

She lay there in her bed, sleepless, cold under the sheets, on a pillow of longing, hugging herself to make the cold go away. The cold that seemed to seep down to her soul, the cold that froze all her dreams, all her songs.

She lay there curled up and thought of him. Fighting those thoughts, trying to push those moments out of her mind was in vain. Many a nights were lost in the fruitless effort. So she gave in to those memories, his face that smiled at her when she closed her eyes, the absence of his warm broad chest when, shivering, she hugged herself even tighter. She had given in to the pain of his memories, to the torture she inflicted on herself when the world lay asleep around her.
She was a pretty normal person by daylight. All petty conversations, fake laughs and superficial jokes. The things enough for the people to put you in the “normal” category and leave u alone. All that was done to earn the little peace of mind when she showed up at work with reddened eyes and dark circles, accompanied with an abnormally cheery smile that never touched her eyes. The peace of mind when that dumb smile shut up all the unconcerned questions about the tears showing from the corners of her chocolate eyes. People, she thought!
She lay there night after night. Remembering some nights his lips on hers. Some nights she thought of how he used to squint in the sunlight as they lay on the grass, and when she shaded his eyes with her fragile hand, he used to smile, at ease, and call her name softly.


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